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People Share The Worst Weddings They’ve Ever Been To (16 Stories)

Have you ever been to a wedding that was seriously awful? I mean, it feels bad to judge an earnest wedding when it just doesn’t live up to expectation. Weddings can be expensive, weather issues are outside of your control, and sometimes family members are unpredictable. But sometimes a wedding is so awful from the start to the finish that it causes you to question whether you want to ever attend one again.

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On Reddit, people are sharing the worst weddings they’ve ever been to—from greedy uncles to no food to sexism and homophobia.

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Let’s just say that you haven’t lived until you’ve heard a fire and brimstone pastor pass judgment on all the sinners in the audience!

1. Counting They Money

“My uncle’s fifth or sixth wedding (I honestly don’t remember which because he’s been married and divorced so many times. He’s even about to remarry a past wife for the second time soon) and he fully expected wedding gifts of cash only. During the reception, he gathered all the envelopes and set himself up at a middle table with a notebook and calculator and counted all the money he got. Instead of enjoying his reception, he was a greedy fecker seeing how much money people gave him. I was barely 20 and I had scrounged up twenty bucks to give him. But when I saw him counting everything up with his damn reading glasses and calculator, I just kept it.” — -Anne_of_Avonlea-

2. The Bride Married Her Math Teacher

“I had never met the bride or groom, he was my then-SO’s coworker. The bride was 18 and the groom was 29, her math teacher. The ceremony was scheduled to start at sundown, but the bride was late getting ready and taking photos, and it started when it was already dark. It was the middle of winter, on a grassy open space, and it had rained the whole week before. Everybody was freezing and muddy, the women wearing heels were holding onto men to be able to walk, and the bride’s something blue were her poor bridesmaids. The whole ceremony was a big ball of cringe, with loads of sexist remarks and the groom implying in his vows that he had taken the bride’s virginity. Then they had McDonald’s for dinner because that’s where they went on their first date (of course, because the bride wasn’t old enough to go anywhere else). She spent the whole night dancing in a circle with her teen friends like it was her sweet 16 or something, while he drank with his 30+ buddies.” — msstark

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3. Bad Cosplay

“I went to a pagan handfasting outside in the groom’s parents’ yard. The bride’s brother showed up in a ripped Sonic the Hedgehog t shirt. All the groomsmen and the groom were in like bad cosplay Jedi robes that were supposed to look ~witchy~ and the bridesmaids were in really weird looking brightly colored, idk, milkmaid dresses, also to look ~witchy~, bride was in a normal wedding dress. The officiant was a friend of the family, in their USMC dress blues, but instead of the normal ceremonial sword thing they can have, he had a mall ninja katana. There was no music. The food was a whole roasted pig, but whoever roasted it hadn’t seasoned it at all, not even salt. They couple divorced about a year later because she was cheating.” — DoxieMonstre

4. No Food, No Fun

“Mormon wedding reception (I’m not a Mormon so I couldn’t be in the temple to see the actual ceremony). It was in their church building, in the not decorated gym. No meal, just cookies and punch. No fun games (my husband and I played the Shoe-ly Wed game and it was a hit). They did a receiving line so it felt like waiting in line at the DMV. The DJ was definitely just their uncle with Spotify, and everyone awkwardly danced in a large circle. It probably didn’t help that we were all like 18-19 years old.” — drae_annx

5. A Modest Wedding

“Sister of a high school friend. They were pretty dang religious when we were in school. I guess I knew the ceremony would be very religious, but I wasn’t expecting it to feel awkward and quite frankly, unwelcoming. At the start of the reception, the father of the bride stood up to tell everyone that dancing is a sin, so therefore there would be no dancing. He also said no alcohol, for I think similar reasons (it’s not the other dry wedding I’ve gone to, but it’s the only one that looked down on alcohol). The father of the bride later chided the groom in front of everyone for not asking him for permission to marry his daughter. They seemed pretty into modesty, so I was surprised that they still did the garter toss…although, they did this by bringing the couple and single men into a separate room and closing the doors. They had privacy for it, but it came off as this weird fun-but-shameful thing (I’m still confused as to why dancing is sinful because sexual connotation, but a dude going up his bride’s skirts to throw lingerie to a crowd was acceptable). The ceremony was lovely, but the reception was pretty awful to attend. Maybe it would have been better it I had been a relative, or member of their congregation. I left as soon as I could. Bride and groom were happy and that’s really all that matters.” — __pigeon__

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6. A Homophobic Ceremony

“My cousin’s wedding, where the officiant announced during the vows that the bride (who I was meeting for the first time that day) had kept herself ‘pure’ for her husband. I asked my cousin during the reception if he had also kept himself pure, hahaha. They were both in their 30s. There was also a LOT of language in the ceremony about how marriage is only true marriage when between a man and woman. Reader this was in 2018. I had also assumed this was going to be a large wedding, as I hadn’t spoken to this cousin or their parents or siblings in several years, but it was quite small. Don’t know why I was invited. Very awkward. Regret not saying ‘gross’ and walking out.” — PDXWanderlust

7. Bride And Mom Got Into A Fistfight

“Bride and her mom got into a fistfight in the church parking lot. The priest tried to break them up and the mom punched him. The reception was in the basement of the church (no food other than the cake, no music or anything) and the bride & groom never showed up. People sat there awkwardly for several hours waiting for them to show before they went home.” — Sonyabean23

8. The Bride’s Dad Had A Stroke

“It was the wedding of my friends mum (I was there as my friends friend). During the speeches the bride’s dad had a stroke. An ambulance came and he was rushed off to hospital. The wedding came to a very abrupt stop and the family was devastated.” — libanator4

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9. Ran Out Of Food

“The one where they didn’t do assigned seats for the dinner, and they had a buffet. Neither are bad if done well, but this was not. The family couldn’t be seated together because by the time the receiving line was over the tables and chairs were mostly taken so they had to be all split up. There were no servers for the buffet, so it was basically a free-for-all and they ran out of some dishes before everyone even made it through the line the first time.” — drunkenknitter

10. Everyone Was Freezing

“An outdoor wedding in November by a lake…it was freezing and hilly. I felt bad for elderly guests who had to walk that. During the ceremony, the officiant bumped into their sand bottle where they had just both put in their sand to represent unity or whatever. Bottle broke and sand went everywhere. Reception was in a tent and was freezing. Everyone wore their coats the whole time.” — dc599152

11. “Pinterest Dreams Gone Wrong”

“The minister told the bride that she would have to love her husband even if he ‘spits in her face with anger.’ Seemed like a weird thing to mention during a wedding ceremony. There were about 150 people there, and they served wood fired pizzas for the reception meal. It sounded and smelled delicious until everyone realized that the oven could only produce two 12″ pizzas at a time, with about 15 minutes in between each batch. Most people spent the reception waiting in an endless line for a sad slice and a room-temperature salad. Their donut cake also didn’t have enough donuts for everyone. The wedding coordinator described it as ‘Pinterest dreams gone wrong.'” — Mission-Interview-88

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12. Teletubbies

“During the wedding party some of the family of the groom planned/’pranked’ the party by dressing in teletubbies costumes and running around to the theme music. Instead of teletubbies masks (that would match the costumes) they had plain cheap white plastic masks from the costume store. It was complete nightmare fuel. Children were crying and it was all I could do not to leave on the spot.” —crimison

13. Shotgun, Redneck Wedding

“Shotgun, redneck wedding in rural Georgia. The bride: a 6 months’ pregnant 19-year-old. The groom: a 27-year-old with a speech impediment. The scene: outdoors at a rundown Victorian farmhouse in rural Georgia in blazing heat of late July. Ceremony held near sunset. Highlights of the ceremony: The bride was walked down the aisle by the groom’s 55+ Father-by-3rd-marriage who was suspected to have slept with the bride. Dirt parking lot. Everyone literally melted in the 90+ degree heat. A monster truck drove by near the end of ceremony, revved its’ engines, and shouted ‘GET ‘ER DONE!’ Highlights of the Reception: the on-site reception was held in the yard (no garden) of the old house, but no one was allowed inside of the house. The ceremony was held at 6pm, but the only food brought out on a small, round table for 50 people was 1 package of Oscar Meyer bologna, a single box of crackers, a couple of packages of pre-sliced cheese and one bunch of grapes. All of the rednecks dropped their tailgates and basically tailgated by drinking whatever booze they brought. They brought a lot of booze. Everyone was drinking, but there was no food, no drink, and there were no port-a-potties. So everyone started walking out into the fields or hiding behind cars to take a piss. After the sun was well down, rednecks started doing meth and smoking weed in their cars in addition to drinking. Everyone got TRASHED. The groom’s actual father (who also had a speech impediment) got so trashed he had to be carried by several men into the bed of a pick up truck and driven away by his buddy who was just drunk and stoned.” — EsseLeo

14. A Destination Wedding

“My cousin had a ‘destination wedding’ probably three hour drive for all the guests. Close enough to drive but far enough to not be able to run back home. Wedding was at like noon, reception wasn’t until almost 6pm. She wanted to go on a drinking bus tour of the city with the wedding party and take her wedding photos before the reception. The entire slew of guests all hung out in the hotel lobby for 5 hours, and there was no food. Eventually we had some people run and get a bunch of taco bell just to tide us over.” — sasspancakes

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15. Cringey Pastor

“The wedding wasn’t bad, it was so fun actually! Ceremony though was super cringe. The pastor decided it was a good time to go on and on about how marriage is between a man and a woman ONLY. We have a large number of gay men there. We worked in theater production. He also went on to bring up current politics, abortions and a woman’s job to please a man. This was a destination wedding so used that church because back when the bride was a baby her family went there. Well the pastor that took over was f*cking crazy. He cornered me after to find out if my soul was clean or not and was telling me to get baptized before leaving the church.” — TenaciousToffee

16. Evil Stepmother

“My dad married a woman that hated me and my whole family. I was 8 and it felt like the saddest day of my life. He’s still married to her and she controls everything. He doesn’t call me or have much of a relationship.” — Yrreke

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