Lindsey Weedston
Senator Ted Cruz showed up for work Friday with a brand new haircut that has the whole internet doing double-takes at his head, which seems to be getting weirder by the day.
On his way to not pay attention during Donald Trump’s historic second impeachment trial, Cruz was photographed sporting something that looks like it could be part high fade, part mullet.
Ted Cruz should be pretty used to jokes about his appearance by now, after starting out with a face like that of a friendless weasel, then growing an ill-fitting beard to try and cover it up. It’s unclear what he was thinking with this haircut, except maybe a desperate attempt to distract us all from how badly the trial is going for Trump, which in turn will make the entire Republican party look terrible when they vote to acquit.
Either that, or he just lost his nerve halfway through getting a high fade and this was the best his poor hairstylist could do.
The cut had been called a fade/mullet combo, a South Dallas shag, and a Kentucky Mudflap, among other things, but most people seem to agree that it can be called a crime against nature, or at least against hair. Here are some of the best slams on the least-liked senator’s scalp atrocity:
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